Thursday, July 25, 2019

When Love Actually Wins

"Love Wins" a phrase that kind of makes my skin crawl if I'm being honest. So when I was asking the Lord about the title for this post and heard "When love actually wins" I wasn't too sure. The world today takes what the Father created in perfection and perverts it, twisting it to fit their version of "truth"... which really isn't truth at all. If "truth" existed outside of Jesus then there would be no actual truth at all, just a sea of opinions... but that's another blog for another day. True love, God's love, by the world's standard is being viewed as hate and their definition of "Love" is so far from truth it barely holds any in it. With that in mind, I have been asking God to teach me how to love like Jesus in a world that fully rejects His love. It's not an easy task and more often than not I get it wrong, but I am determined to love well.

As of late I have been trying to listen for the voice of God when I am out in the marketplace. I want to practice hearing and responding in obedience. It is always easier said than done but I have never once regretted stepping out and showing Jesus to someone. I have however, had regret over disobedience and not responding when I should have. So it should have come as no surprise recently when the Father spoke to me in the check out line of my local grocery store. His asking for my Yes while I was bagging groceries, made me pause and consider if I was really "all in" like I say I am. With Jesus my "Yes" should be as big at the grocery store as it is in the four walls of the church; let me backtrack a little and explain what I mean.
I had just finished checking out and I was bagging my groceries. I looked up and my eye caught an enormous glittery earring. I thought... WOW those are some big blingy earrings. As I looked more closely I saw it was the cashier in the next isle over. At first I thought it was a woman, then I realized it wasn't. As much as I want to pretend right now that my immediate reaction to the realization that this woman was actually a man was not judgement, it very much was. In response to my judgement the Father spoke these simple words "I love him desperately". I took a deep breath, disappointed in my thoughts of judgement toward this man I responded to the Father; "I know you do, I'm sorry." The conversation continued as He said to me "will you tell him?" To which I responded "I don't know if I can." Fear disguised as logic was trying to creep in but then I heard His voice again; "What if your the only one who ever tells him how much I love him". Double sigh. I knew I couldn't argue with that. I walked out to my car to load my groceries and muster up the strength to go speak to the cashier. While I loaded my groceries I started thinking I couldn't possibly interrupt the cashier while he was working... more fear disguised as logic. I also knew however, I couldn't walk away and not be obedient so I wrote down the words God had spoken to me on a piece of paper. My attempt for an easy out? probably, but just wait, it gets better.
I walked back into the store and marched straight into the bathroom fighting an inner dialogue the whole way of reasons why I shouldn't do this. I was scared. Of what? I'm not really sure but I told the Father while I stood in the grocery store bathroom that I was scared and didn't think I could do this.
"What if he get's mad?" I said,  "what if he doesn't" God responded. Again, an answer I couldn't argue with.
I walked out of the bathroom over to the cashier as he was in between customers. I had decided to give him the note and walk away but God had other plans. I approached and said "I hate to interrupt you while your working..." he turned around locked his register and interrupted me saying "But..." that was it, I was in too deep to use my note. So I looked him in the eyes and said "This might sound a little crazy to you, but I was over there bagging my groceries and Jesus highlighted you to me. He told me to tell you that he loves you desperately. He sees you right where your at. He knows your struggles and He is right there with you in the middle of it. Jesus loves you so much and wants you to know it today." I was a little stunned at what I had just done and a little anxious about how he would respond to it. He looked at me with deep blue sad eyes. I could see years of pain searching for love and acceptance in them. As he looked at me, he smiled and I watched as joy seemed to seep into his sad blue eyes. Then he said to me; "Thank you, you have no idea how much that means to me." I sighed with relief at his positive response.  Then he said to me "Do you hug?" to which I responded " Of course I hug". So there in the middle of the grocery store with a line of customers waiting we stood and hugged. I wanted to burst into tears because I felt the love of Jesus so strong in that moment. I very literally felt the heart of the Father over him.
As I walked away I thanked God for choosing me to speak on his behalf to this man and I prayed for him and cried all the way home.

Friends, I am convinced this is how we begin to love people back into the kingdom. There was no radical salvation... yet. There was no pointing out his sin and demanding repentance in that very moment. The request made of me was simply to share the love of Jesus over him. It planted a seed of hope. As I prayed for the cashier on my way home I asked that the next person God put in his path would be obedient and they would plant another seed, then another, and another that eventually there would be fruit.

I don't tell you this story to boast about anything I did. There is nothing to boast about. My initial reaction to this man was a disappointing one of judgement. I wanted to drive away and pretend I wasn't hearing the voice of the Father. I looked for every excuse not to obey. I had to run into the bathroom for a second pep-talk from God before I had enough courage to simply say Yes. Saying "Jesus loves you" to a perfect stranger who I was likely to never see again shouldn't be that hard. I suppose this just shows me how much growing I still have to do.
My flawed reactions are hard to admit publicly like this because I wish they had been perfect, like Jesus'. They were not, but I share all of this because I want to assure you that if I can do it, you for sure can.
We need to be Christians who are not afraid to give our Yes and give it fully. That means Yes in the church and Yes in the marketplace. Sometimes the Yes will be weak and difficult, sometimes it will be confident and strong. The strength of our Yes is not the point. He can work with any willing, obedient heart. The point is are we willing to be Jesus to the man in the grocery store that most people will refuse to even make eye contact with? I know I want to be, and not just this once but every time he prompts.

"Love is patient, Love is kind, it does not envy or boast, it is not proud and does not dishonor others. Love is not self seeking, it's not easily angered, Love keeps no record of wrong and does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. Love always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres."
- 1 Corinthians 3:4-7

Today I challenge you, in a world where love is losing and it's definition is being annihilated, will you redefine and let the Love of Jesus win?

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